3 S.R. Johannes: Things I love to Hate

Saturday, February 14, 2009

Things I love to Hate

Everything is so mushy out there today. I realized that as much as I love some things, I really despise others. And I'm not ashamed to say I love to hate those things. Just to be different, here's a list:

  • peas (any kind)

  • cooked carrots (I like raw ones)

  • broccoli on my pizza

  • pineapple

  • boogers

  • war

  • dirty diapers

  • western movies

  • racism

  • cockroaches

  • indifference

  • conformity

  • the smell of gasoline

  • the word - moist (yuk even writing it makes me cringe)

  • snorts

  • liver (not the organ, just the food)

  • puddles (of anything)

  • touching bathroom stall doors

  • commercials (unless it the SuperBowl)

  • drama (unless its YA of course)

  • people in character suits

  • humidity (mostly b/c of my hair)

  • smell of trash

  • hearing someone gag

  • waking up to a dirty kitchen

  • touching old food

  • fighting

  • driving a stick shift on hills

  • seeing blood (as long as its in my body its ok)

  • mold in the shower (not that I have any!)

  • old soggy soap with a hair on it

  • scratchy towels

  • combs (its a danger to my natural curly hair)

  • bad coffee (Yes, I am a coffee snob)

  • touching other people's feet (Sorry honey!)

  • getting up early (before 8)

  • when I'm out of creamer

  • talking to utility companies on the phone

  • junk mail

  • negativity

  • people who take themselves WAY TO SERIOUSLY

  • greedy companies

  • alligators (they freak me out!)

  • bread crust

  • the water that first comes out of ketchup bottles (YUK!)

  • crust on a milk jug

  • people who carry on a really long inappropriate convo on their cell phone in Starbucks. I'm talking like non-stop

  • cracked heels

  • cellulite (not that I have any!)

  • ear hair

  • people who pick up the phone to sat they are busy

  • stepping in dog poo or gum

  • finding tissues in the dryer (means someone blew their nose and my clothes were washed in it)

  • littering

  • smell of cooked beef, fish or eggs

  • wilted lettuce

  • slow computers

  • chain letters

  • running up hills

  • poppyseeds

  • blackheads

  • lists

  • a long bad joke

  • people who talk about themselves

  • politicial rhetoric

  • when it rains hard while I'm driving on the highway

  • airport or hospital food

  • reading about tragedies (unless its Shakespeare)

  • traffic (unless its blog traffic! Then I say, Jam on!)

  • long toenails
  • round-abouts (who goes first?!)

How about you? What grosses you out?


Unknown said...

Broccoli on pizza?! Who would do that?!?!

Christy Raedeke said...

Hilarious! Particularly loved "hearing someone gag, crust on a milk jug, ketchup water, and a long bad joke" so true!

Carrie Harris said...

As a mom of three, I think that ketchup bottle water is a major problem that should be studied by Nobel Laureate scientists.

Otherwise, I may snap one of these days. :)

Unknown said...

I despise the word moist. All my friends know it. Hilarious that you write it. When I read the title of this list I immediately thought of that word.

Ewwwww- Long toenails....

Anonymous said...

You crack me up. These are hysterical. I agreed with almost all of them. Except for the pineapple. Don't mess with the pineapple. And pineapple on pizza! Yum--my 11 year old daughter turned me on to that one.

Anonymous said...

My sister's married name is Moist. Isn't that sad?

And here's a clue about the ketchup for you and Carrie: shake it first!